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A bottle named desire

By JAMES LAURENTI + JESSIE PRAY

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We at The Second Glass may have mixed feelings about this "Hallmark Holiday," but luckily we all agree on one thing: There needs to be booze, and lots of it. The object of your desire might love the V-Day or hate it, but regardless, these wines will help get them in the sack. It's game time, so put on your finest pair of unmentionables and prepare to call in sick to work on Friday.

The Panty Remover

We hear a lot of people bitch about how Valentine's Day has become a commercialized ordeal. Every year it's the same song and dance of spending a crap-ton of cash on ephemeral flowers, a fancy dinner and overpriced wine all to make a girl happy so that you can get your bones smooched. While we can't save you from dropping dough on dinner (trust me, taking her to Uno's doesn't work), we have you covered on the wine. Go to the ATM, withdraw one crisp twenty-dollar bill and buy a bottle of Piedmont, Italy's greatest gift to the man, Banfi Rosa Regale Brachetto d'Acqui.

Even if you can't tell a Bordeaux from a Budweiser, you'll know your money was well spent once this sweet, fizzy elixir hits the lips. As the first bubbly drops tickle her tongue and imbue her palate with deliciously fresh raspberry-strawberry flavor, you'll notice a change in her appearance. Giving a shudder as she's overcome with hedonistic euphoria, she'll bite her lip, begin to fidget and start to gasp between words. Just be sure you're well rested or you won't have a prayer.

[Available for $20 at Charles Street Liquors, 143 Charles St., Beacon Hill, Boston. 617.523.5051. csliquors.com]

Vino Viagra

Let's cut our dudes a break. Chances are they've' been cowering in fear at the thought of flowers, chocolates and an impossible-to-get dinner reservation at a swanky restaurant. In lieu of receiving edible undies and being crammed onto a crowded banquet, you can take control of this holiday and enjoy a lusty evening at home with the wine and food of your choice. The bonus part is he'll think you're doing it for him.

Tell him that you, in fact, will be cooking a romantic meal at home—bribing your stoner roommate off the couch may be an additional cost. If your inclinations are not exactly Martha Stewart, don't fret as plenty of supermarkets offer pre-cooked selections and restaurants will be more than happy to provide you with the duck à l'orange your lover so desires.

The perfect Valentine's Day wine that appeals to both him and, more importantly, you, is the Veramonte Primus, a delicious blend of Merlot, Cabernet and Carménère from Chile. A velvety sensation will coat your throat with a massively mouth-filling punch of fruit and spice. The lush blackberry and cherry notes are enough to entice even the most conservative of couples into a torrid embrace. Drink with caution: After all, wine stains are awfully hard to get off the sheets.

[Available for $20 at Bauer Wine & Spirits, 330 Newbury St., Boston. 617.262.0363. bauerwines.com]

FOR MORE INFORMATION: THESECONDGLASS.COM