Soirée Après-Ski

A cheesy, chocolatey way to thaw

By LINDSAY CRUDELE, CHRISTINE LIU AND JAFFNEY ROODE

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QUICK FIX

Remember a few of these favorite things if you're feeling cold this winter, like the Alpine comfort plate of Jaeger Schnitzel ($9.95) at Jacob Wirth [31 Stuart St., Boston. 617.338.8586. jacobwirth.com]: a crispy, breaded veal tenderloin, served with creamy dill spaetzle and Jaegermeister-mushroom sauce. We can't promise you won't feel so bad Chocolate Bar after indulging at the Langham Hotel's chocolate bar [$35, Saturdays 12pm-3pm, 250 Franklin St., Boston. 617.956.8751. boston.langhamhotels.com], but it's worth a shot. The 19th season of the Langham Hotel's chocolate orgy features a new ice cream bar, cakes and tortes, fondues and made-to-order chocolate crêpes. Pick up a to-go cup of rich, velvety hot chocolate from L.A. Burdick [52 Brattle St., Harvard Sq., Cambridge. 617.491.4340. burdickchocolate.com], now available in a less imposing $2 demi-shot, and a slice of Linzer Torte. Take it home and curl up outside the backyard fireplace you ordered [$94.99, available at acehardware.com] -- store owner and wise neighborhood fixture Josef Porteleki will have it shipped to his Roslindale Hardware [4407 Washington St., Roslindale. 617.323.8639. roslindalehardware.com] location for you free of charge.

DRINKS

We're not sure who the hell is a-wassailing, but freezing nights are best remedied with a vat of heady, seasonal brew. Concoct grog, sangria's hardened alpine cousin, by mulling red wine, spices and spirits on the stove; or let your guests spike their own glass with an eggnog-and-boozes buffet. For those not daunted by cooking actual custard, try making this version -- arteries be damned.

Holiday Eggnog (makes 16 cups; serves 18-20) | Courtesy of Mount Gay

8 large eggs

4 egg yolks

1 cup granulated sugar

5 cups whole milk

1/2 cup Mount Gay Eclipse Rum

2 cups Rémy Martin V.S.O.P. Cognac

3 cups Bourbon

1 tbsp. pure vanilla extract

1 tsp. freshly grated nutmeg

2 cups whipping cream

2 tbsp. superfine sugar

1. In a mixing bowl, whisk eggs, yolks and granulated sugar until smooth. Pour into a large, heavy-bottomed saucepan. Stir in milk, one cup at a time, blending well with each addition. Heat slowly over very low heat, stirring steadily, until the mixture reaches 160ºF on an instant-read thermometer. The custard should be thick enough to coat the back of a spoon: If you draw your finger across the back of the spoon and the line remains distinct, then the custard sauce is done.

2. Pour the custard through a fine-meshed sieve into large bowl. Stir in Rémy Martin V.S.O.P. Cognac, Mount Gay Eclipse rum, Bourbon, vanilla and nutmeg. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate until cold, at least three hours and up to three days.

3. Just before serving, whip cream to very soft peaks, beating in the superfine sugar as you go. Gently fold into custard mixture until incorporated. Serve from a chilled punch bowl or in individual martini glasses, garnishing with optional grated nutmeg.

DIY

Although the chances of an actual winter wonderland materializing inside your apartment are slim, there's absolutely nothing stopping you from going blindingly blitz-Swiss.

If you've planned the party ahead or just have really fast fingers, you can make Fair Isle knits into coasters, runners or coffee mug cozies. Stock up on wool at Boston's newest yarn store, Stitch House [846 Dot. Ave., Dorchester. 617.265.8013. stitchhousedorchester.com], and since you're so ambitious, maybe lap blankets for everyone?

Though predicting the weather is about as easy as Sister Wendy, with just a little bit of effort -- and, by God, a mighty mop -- you can make everything in sight glisten with freshly fallen snow. Open boxes of Domino confectionary sugar and dust it over everything sweet, or merely fight over powdered doughnuts and crullers [80 cents each, available at Lyndell's Bakery, 720 Broadway, Ball Sq., Somerville. 617.625.1793] and let the dust settle.

And even if you're not actually on the slopes, you can pretend in miniature form by constructing your own ski-opolis. Throw down a thick layering of white craft felt or fleece for snow, then bust out a tin of classy Lincoln Logs [Commemorative edition, $39, available at Boing!, 729 Centre St., Jamaica Plain. 617.522.7800. boingtoys.com]. Let the spontaneous chalet-development commence.

EATS

Ah, the holidays. There's no better time to recreate one of the finer Alpine traditions than by gathering your friends for a night of dipping tiny amounts of food into bubbling hot liquids. Ladies, take a hair-braiding clue from Heidi; guys, arrange your bits and pieces into your best lederhosen. It's fondue time.

The genius of throwing a fondue party is that you make your guests cook for themselves. The dirty dishes will be minimal, leaving you plenty of time to yodel the night away. Get a few of your besties to show up early and help you to mix, melt and cube your ingredients. Aside from a bevy of Swiss beauties, you'll also need your very own fondue set. My friend Marie said her family's bright orange '70s set came in a box featuring a startlingly blond German family decked out in matching turtleneck sweaters, sitting around a fireplace. You can get your own affordable -- though perhaps less charming -- set from Crate & Barrel [48 Brattle St., Harvard Sq., Cambridge. 617.876.6300. crateandbarrel.com] for around seventy bucks.

Chances are that on a cold New England night you'll want to prepare both chocolate and cheese fondue. Mike Stead, owner of the The Melting Pot [92 Worcester Rd., Framingham. 508.875.3115. meltingpot.com], says not to worry about getting fancy: Hershey's Kisses will do just fine. Stir the chocolate with milk or water and dip in whatever your sweet tooth warrants: cubed pieces of pound cake, Rice Krispies Treats, pretzels, etc.

For cheese fondue, Roberta Dowling, director of the Cambridge Culinary School [2020 Mass. Ave., Porter Sq., Cambridge. 617.354.2020. cambridgeculinary.com], suggests traditional fondue Neuchâtel, which calls for Emmenthaler, Gruyère, white wine, Kirsch (cherry brandy), pepper and salt (depending on how much salt there is in the cheese). Dowling recommends hitting up Formaggio Kitchen [244 Huron Ave., Cambridge. 617.354.4750. formaggiokitchen.com] for their large selection of European cheeses. While you're there pick up a freshly made baguette. Cut it into bite-sized cubes, leaving crust on each piece, to strengthen the bread against the ravages of hot cheese.

Once you've amassed your crew, start melting and dipping. The tiny, communal fondue crock will force you to get cozy. Crank up the Sterno and take advantage of the extra body heat.

TRY IT, YOU'LL LIKE IT

Got some cheap, bracingly bad vodka lying around from your last party? Disinfect your bathroom (it'll go down the shitter with good measure) or in an ironic twist, use it on vomit stains: spray, scrub and blot dry.