HEADS WE LOSE

A brutal home loss unlike anything Boston has seen since the late '70s.

At least we got to do some exit polls in the aftermath.

Go Anaheim. Please beat New York.

We cannot allow A-Rod to ever win a championship. Ever.

Motherfucking Shit Shit Shit!

I was there Sunday.

I was sitting there in the front row, section 43, bleachers, with my seven year old son, his box of popcorn in one hand and a foam finger on the other, with my cold beer perched between my feet, watching it unfold. As I sat, counting down the outs, and eventual hours to game four where we'd win again, then fly back to the west coast for what would undoubtedly be one of the greatest comebacks in ALDS history, it was all going down the way it was supposed to. When you're the Red Sox, anything can happen… and does.

But that’s not quite what happened. No, it really didn't go down that way at all. In fact, as I sat there watching Pap put Hunter on first so he could face Vlad and try to close out the inning unscathed, I knew what was about to happen; we were about to get swept…

…and that's what happened.

Boston fans live and die for their teams and it hurts when the teams lose. It's even worse when that team gets their ass handed to them, when the hopes of winning are still so high. Sure, we still have those other teams but that doesn’t make up for the loss, especially when it's a Red Sox loss. In the playoffs. Getting swept.

Kudos to the Angels is in order, I guess...

How many days until Spring Training?

My Head Hurts

Ok, so I was right about their pitching (Lackey had a great game) but I blew it with Hunter. He came through in the clutch but now must die. To that end, I've hired a professional witch doctor who is at this very moment soaking his jersey in chicken blood. I kid you not.

Weaver's jersey is next. Although, it may not be necessary. He had 16 wins, a career high, but wasn't that strong in the homestretch and he's certainly not as big-game tested as Beckett, who comes in with 17 wins and a chip on his shoulder for not getting the game one start. Expect to see him throw hard and fast and have good command over the plate despite not pitching to Varitek. Like I said, he has a chip on his shoulder and something to prove. You could put my grandma (God rest her soul) behind the plate and he'd feel comfortable tonight.

As for the Red Sox bats, that didn't show up last night, you can expect that to change. Bay is poised to get hot, Pedroia is due and I think Big Papi will yet again rise to the occasion and throw down some serious wood tonight. With a bat, of course, I mean, you know what I mean...

Big prediction: Weaver leaves by the fourth inning and it's all down hill from there for the Halos.

One-Sided Argument

I'll just be honest here, I am considerably nervous about tonight's game out in Pasadena (or Anaheim, or Carson City ... Venice? Who fucking knows) because the odds of probability are stacked against the beloved Red Sox.

But then I stop for a moment. Do the odds of probability even apply here? If I flip a quarter 10 times, I'd bet $1,000 it comes up tails at least once, but what if the heads side is weighted with talent, pitching and clutch-hitting?



You see what I'm getting at. Last night on Boston's WEEI some goober was insisting the Angels would win in three merely by the laws of probability.



Memo to WEEI dumb-ass: These rules do not apply. They only apply to things which are evenly matched.

GET IT?

OK. I feel better now.

Bartender? I'll have a Harpoon IPA.

PS: John Muir = FAIL, Minuteman = WIN.

PPS: Sports talk dudes. Stop talking about politics. Don't ever talk about politics.

Do They Angels Have What It Takes To Keep Sucking Post Season?

You bet.

Nevermind their most recent history, the Angels perfected the choke long before and have become consumed by their ghosts. The people of Los Anaheim know this and are eager to cry like a Halloween cat at the first sign of yet another post-season trainwreck. I suspect that Lackey will have a decent game tonight notwithstanding, but I also expect to see Torii "Dogface" Hunter come up short when it counts - like he always does.

According to Mike Scioscia, the Angels manager, as quoted on espn.com, "he doesn't believe there's anything special about the stark statistics his club has compiled against Boston." "I don't think there is anything, really, to go back and analyze," said Scioscia, the first manager to take a team to the playoffs six times in his first 10 seasons. "It's a whole new set of variables, a whole new set of matchups. We know what the challenge is.""

And that challenge is to put those demons to rest and actually win more than one game. Good luck shaking that bag of bones off your back, buddy!

Choke-rod

In reading the goddam ceaseless praise everyone seems to have for the Yankees this year there's something that Jayson Stark points out that appears to be far from everyone's mind.

A-Rod has a new post-season choke buddy.

And I'm not talking about who watches him kiss himself in the mirror after the game, or which ever country superstar A-Rod tries to bed that night. What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom, and there's nothing wrong with that.

But here's some stats to check out:

Games: 5

Wins: 2

Loses: 3

Walks: 22

Strike Outs: 24   

ERA: 7.92

Who's post-season is that? SURPRISE.

Clearly the wasted Twins will be fish-food for CC, but if he starts to quake in the spotlight to the lowly Twins tonight, just wait until he gets to round two. TOAST.

The Angels. Again.

The Angels! Again??!?!

Yes they are back for more, but this time, they have been retooled to divide and conquer the poor Red Sox.

What's that? You don't buy what I'm selling?

Yeah, me neither.

The fact remains, the Angels could run circles around our catchers or be as patient at the plate as a fat dude waiting for his Hot Pocket to come out of the microwave but the inevitablility of a Red Sox win comes down to one thing.

PITCHING.

John "Cursing Maniac" Lackey and Jared "Remember My Brother?" Weaver just can't stack up to Jon "Your Line Drive Means Nothing Compared to Cancer" Lester and Josh "I Beat NYC in NYC after 9/11" Beckett.

Prediction courtesy of our friends in Duxbury (where the oysters are THE BOMB, btw)

PS: Angels fans, don't let Lackey see that. He's lose his cool and throw a wild pitch and Ellbury will score from second.