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DEAR READER
By DAVID DAY
I hate it when people talk about the weather. It's the default for every conversation ever, and there always must be something more interesting to discuss. That said ... What the fuck is going on with the weather?
Judging by my own manic period of surfing and phoning and crawling last week, it appears no one has any fucking idea why God has put a spray fart in Massachusetts Bay. It might be that the answer is pretty frightening.
In 2003, the president of the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution wrote an article titled "Abrupt Climate Change: Should We Be Worried?" He theorizes that the Global Ocean Conveyor, which may drive the Earth's weather, is starting to slow. If the North Atlantic gets a massive injection of fresh water, the slowing will increase, like introducing water to a gas engine. The rapid melts in the Arctic, which is for sure melting, would be that massive injection.
The result will be widespread—including drought in the Midwest, and a cold and wet East Coast. As Woods Hole concluded: "Climate change may be inevitable. But it is not inevitable for society to be ill-prepared."
The problem is, who is preparing us? We're too busy tracking down members of Whitesnake or seeing advances of Public Enemies to do the legwork, and unfortunately, if the Globe reports any bad news ever it will go out of business. Which, I suppose, leaves it to you, our dear readers. Drop us a line: twitter.com/theweeklydig or facebook.com/weeklydig.
Just don't get too close to the coastline.
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